The Car
by Anneka Neko
Summary: DISCONTINUED. We all know that Ban loves that car of his. But just how far will he go to rescue it? main pairing: BanxTheCar. There's some AkabanexGinji, but they're more like friends plotting together against poor Ban. Rated T for Ban's cussing.


Authoress' Notes:

This is one of those ideas that I honestly don't understand. I was bored one day and all of a sudden, the first 3 paragraphs popped into my head. As I was typing about the 5th paragraph, suddenly I knew the entire plotline.

Anyways, the basic idea of this fic is, "Ah, the things Ban will do for that car of his…"

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**Chapter One**

**Missing**

Ban ran down the sidewalk, panting. Sweat dripped down his face, but he didn't pause to wipe it off. He nearly tripped over a little girl, but barely paused to make sure she was okay before he was off again, running.

He felt panicked. His love, his darling, the light of his life, had vanished.

"Dammit!" he hissed. "And that was a legal parking space too! Where's my car?" He felt shaky, not knowing where his baby was, or if she was gonna be okay. It vaguely occurred to him that he hadn't seen Ginji in three days, but he had more important things to deal with right now. He didn't know what he'd do if he couldn't find his car.

He wasn't sure he could live.

-----

Ginji, being held hostage by Dr. Jackal, was getting a bit impatient. _You'd think Ban would have noticed by now that I'm gone. Wish he'd hurry up and rescue me!_

Akabane knew from Ginji's annoyed expression what he was thinking about. "Don't worry, Ginji-kun. Ban-san will be here soon enough." He drew back a curtain to reveal Ban's car hidden in his driveway.

-----

Ban knew in his heart (those Car-diovascular GPS systems were amazing, he thought to himself) that his baby was somewhere in or near the city. But where?

He passed a park and suddenly tried to stop. Unfortunately, he had been running so fast that he didn't stop until he skidded face-first into the trunk of a huge tree. _Owww…_ Ban thought. But then, he remembered his car. Things like crushed faces could wait for later.

-----

"…why do you have Ban-chan's car, Akabane-sama?"

"I was bored."

Ginji thought it odd that Akabane didn't alleviate his boredom in his usual bloody manner; not that he was complaining. "And… why am I here?"

Akabane smiled. "Why Ginji-kun, I wouldn't deprive you of this." He untied Ginji, allowing him to step closer to the window and see the full extent of Akabane's wicked plot.

-----

Ban turned away from the tree, and saw a huge lake. His car seemed to be calling to him from across that lake, but he couldn't have walked around the lake in less than 4 hours, and there was no boat of any kind.

Rather than abandon his baby, Ban took off his white shirt and plunged into the lake.

"OH MY GOD THAT IS FRIKKIN COLD!" Ban made known his displeasure at the water temperature, but then remembered his car and began swimming.

He winced as something nibbled at his toe. Looking down, he saw a school of baby piranhas.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Ban screamed, taking off as fast as he could swim across the lake.

-----

Akabane had constructed an obstacle course. A huge lake ended at the foot of a gigantic cliff, at the top of which was a huge forest. The house they were in was on the other side of the freeway that ran through said forest.

"…you want to see how attached Ban-chan is to his car?"

"Exactly, Ginji-kun." Akabane smiled, pleased that Ginji had understood so quickly.

"…and you didn't want to deprive me of a chance to laugh at Ban-chan?"

"Precisely."

After a pause, Ginji grinned. "This should be funny!"

**nyanyanyanyanya**

Isn't Akabane-sama _evil_? That's why we love him! See? Even in a story about Ban and his car, I _still_ can't resist the AkabanexGinji fluff!

I apologize for the pain I must have caused everyone with that Car-diovascular joke. But I mean… I felt so clever! In his heart… it's a car… knows where it is… car-diovascular GPS? -shot- I know it's bad! No killing! x.x;

Out of sheer boredom, I created a VERY classy map. It shows Ban's path thus far, along with a general map of the entire story. Details will be added on a new map every chapter, 'cause I'm all nice like that. Go to my profile if you want the link, since this dumb site won't let ya put a URL in a post.

No clue on update schedule. This is one of those "write when I'm bored" fics, so it all depends on my boredom level, I guess.

Please review!


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